I spotted a new title for Greta Thunberg the other day:

The pigtailed Swedish doom goblin.

Doesn’t that just hit the bullseye? Greta was in a ‘How DARE you forget me!’ mood and claimed that she had coronavirus.

Uh-huh… colour me skeptical. Kathy ‘Trump beheaded’ Griffin made the same announcement to the world, throwing in heaps of condemnation for POTUS. A case of Bad Orange Woman howling Orange Man Bad.

The perils of self-diagnosis! Kathy didn’t have the virus de jour – she had an abdominal infection. Attention seeker defused.

Meanwhile, here in The Great South Land, the Welcome Wagon has been repurposed as the Bugger Off Bus.

Vigilantes in some Australian outback towns have reportedly slashed tyres of those fleeing coronavirus hotspots in the big cities, according to a government minister who urged calm on Friday…

As the borders are being shut, we are seeing a surge of grey nomads from southern states, and also from southeast Queensland, go to southwest Queensland to hide from the coronavirus… Unfortunately this action could turn caravans into the cruise ships of the outback if someone is infected and spreads it in small communities.

Somewhat self-defeating, to be sure. Maybe a big sign at the edge of town would be more effective.

Really, though, what is so hard to understand in STAY THE FUCK AT HOME?

For those selfish thoughtless types who aren’t pigtailed Swedish doom goblins, a new title has emerged:

Covidiots.

I daresay some of you are currently enjoying self-isolation with your spouse or partner. This may help return a bit of spice to the relationship if it’s becoming strained at such close quarters.

Better hope something works. With all this enforced togetherness, some family trees are at risk of a radical pruning.

When billionaire recluse Howard Hughes died, newspaper reports described his beard and fingernails as ‘grossly long’.
I’ve got the recluse part down, anyhow. And I’m working on the fingernails.

He dodged the coronavirus, much to his mother’s annoyance, but now this.

Prince Andrew tests positive for Gonorrhoea

The Prince, who had promised to knob less than 100 women a week given the new social distancing protocol, is believed to have failed in his assurances.

His non-suicidal friend would be so happy.

A friend saw my earlier post mentioning The Sound Of Music and forwarded this.

The hills are alive…with the Chinese virus. They’ve been planning this…for a dozen years…

The hills are alive… with the Chinese virus… and now…it’s right here. Rght here!

I want to run to my room and dive under the bed when I see a chinaman pass.

I won’t leave the house. I just sit..on… my arse.

I’ll run to my hills when the panic’s over. I’ll spray everything before I go.

One day well be free from the Chinese virus…but just when…I dunno .

Not a bad effort for a beginner!

A couple of weeks ago I noted at the local supermarket that while people were fighting for toilet paper, there was still a full stack of the free local newspaper at the door.

Well…

The tp shelves are still empty. And that stack of free papers has disappeared, too.

Just a couple of weeks ago the lefties were drooling over the prospects of a coronavirus cleanse.

Watts Up With That quotes an article that captures the mood:

Don’t take this the wrong way but if you were a young, hardline environmentalist looking for the ultimate weapon against climate change, you could hardly design anything better than coronavirus.

Unlike most other such diseases, it kills mostly the old who, let’s face it, are more likely to be climate sceptics.

WUWT points out that the original title of the piece, reading from its web address, was ‘Coronavirus has a silver lining’.

Nothing too surprising there. It was Lenin himself, after all, who said that you had to break a few eggs to make an omlette.

But now, in a wholly-to-be-expected turnaround, media person Joe Scarborough has accused the Trump administration of being ready to let elderly Americans die.

And Cher, who was musically interesting in a previous existence, has declared that President Donald Trump has her mother and herself on the list of sacrificial lambs.

What would Vladimir Ilyich Ulyanov say to Cher, I wonder?
Ah, dushenka… you’re just a couple of eggs to me seems a reasonable guess.

Time to face facts: not even the coronavirus will get me interested in watching The Sound Of Music.

Queen Pissed After MI5 Infect The Wrong Son

Direct from the pages of The (un)Australian – ‘Australia’s finest suppository of news and views’:

With Covid-19

“She was heard to mutter, the one time that Andrew manages to avoid picking up something that was 19.”

Follow the link!

I haven’t had any inspiration yet this year for a Gina Elise motivator. Could be that my subconscious is distracted by other possibilities.